Sydney Wildlife World

For fuck's sake, look at that mutha right there. A huge stick insect, camouflaged for effect you see, just casually hanging off the branch. "Don't get too close!!" I hear from a great distance. I turn around, and there he is, half way across the room, fearing for his life. Oh for crying out loud, it's not going to bite you. (It doesn't bite, does it? No? Seeeee. I told you).

Anyway. Moving onto more creepy crawlies. "If I wanted to see creepy crawlies, I'd open my cupboards". Isn't that giant cockroach just the cutest thing? It just makes you want to pat it. Sigh. No, I don't have any bug spray. No, I don't have a rolled up newspaper.

We come across the "Flight Canyon", a semi open oasis for all these wild birds. Yeah, they've got it good alright. Well you'd think so too, if you had a place to eat, sleep, fly around and crap wherever the hell you wanted to. The place was filled with fat birds. Geez, the size of them. They were cute and fat. They're living the good life. I felt sorry for this one rainbow lorikeet, the poor thing was literally cornered into the bushes by this male satin bower bird, who kept trying to peck it, telling it to piss off, before it does something it'll regret. It was disgusting. The lorikeet looked so helpless, backing itself into the bushes, but still eyeing those pile of seeds. We couldn't tell if it was injured so it couldn't just fly off, or if it was just dumb. I mean, honestly, give it up already. Sure the bower bird had some seeds on his little stone plate that the lorikeet kept trying to get at, but there's plenty more where that came from elsewhere? Or maybe it was just in love. Awww.....Pathetic. You're not even the same species, ya fool. Hmm, it's gotta be those seeds.

We finally come across this butterfly sanctuary, with all different sized and coloured wings fluttering around peacefully, landing on everything and everyone, it seemed, except me. Damn it. Why don't you like me? Alright, that's it. We're not leaving until we get a decent butterfly land on me for more than a second, by god, we'll be here all night if we have to.

So I hold out both my hands, palms up, trying not to get my hopes up, and out of the depths of the forest, this graceful creature comes floating towards me, and unbelievably, it's landed on my fingertips, spreading its beautiful wings out on purpose like it's showing off. I was feeling completely awestruck, just staring at the thing, wishing time would stand still. I felt so privileged, thank god I had someone to share this with. Apparently it's not the usual thing for them to spread their wings out like that when it's resting, it usually does that when it's courting. We later discover it was a varied male eggfly.

It attracted the attention of other people, wondering how they too could have a butterfly land on them. I even had this woman, seemingly a professional photographer, based on the lens she used, take a photograph, saying how beautiful it was. Its left wing had been torn slightly, been in a few courtship battles, probably. Though I can't imagine something like that fighting. It's so gentle.

Just makes you appreciate nature all the more. Except maybe the creepy crawlies.

That must be the happiest kid in the world

Gavin's Mom: Gavin, don't you already have this game?
Gavin: No, Mom, you idiot! I have Bloodstorm, and Bone Squad, and Bloodstorm II, stupid.
Gavin's Mom: Oh, I'm sorry, honey. We'll take a Bonestorm.
Gavin: Get two. I'm not sharing with Caitlin!
Bart: (dreamily) That must be the happiest kid in the world.

I keep replaying that scene over and over in my mind, even though I can't see what it's got to do with this year's Christmas party. This year we were living it up. Or as they say, we were big pimpin' it. Ugh. That just sounds wrong. Anyway, those of you who've read over my past entries may well recall the craptastic Xmas party we had last year. And that was a shocker if there ever was one. Couldn't even fall short of this year's if it tried.

I'll tell you what happened, right. We all met up at Bronte, and the weather was a little overcast, but it was fine enough. We strolled down the paths along the cliffs towards Bondi Beach. The best part was the sound of the waves and that fresh ocean air. Every few hundred metres there were people walking their cute puppies. It's a good pick up trail. The people living in those beachside apartments don't know how good they've got it, the bastards.

So we all managed to make it to Campbell Parade, to this place called Sobo. Our people were already there trying to hook up with each other, and taking advantage of the all expenses paid champagne cocktails and canapes. I even managed to get two glasses of Veuve Clicquot. Wouldn't mind some of that again, that's for sure. Yes, well of course there was a tab, but who's counting? Next thing you know, everyones seated across 5 white tableclothed tables, and sharing entrees of seared scallops and quail caesar salad. Well lah dee dah I hear you say.

Yes, that's exactly what I was thinking. We had a choice of three mains - potato and sage gnocchi with butternut pumpkin, seared swordfish with tomato, basil and olive salsa, and lamb cutlets with wilted spinach. The menu was edited especially for us. So I went with the fish, and it was undoubtably the best fish I've ever had, it was a decent sized portion, and boneless and seared perfectly, it didn't have fishy aftertaste, and it had the softest white flesh that just melted in your mouth. Well worth whatever the hell it cost.

So we all had to sit bloated for a while, still drinking vast amounts of alcohol, to keep our liquids up, don't you know, while we waited for dessert. Dessert was also a shared affair, trying to keep the cost down I suppose. It was a nice little taste tester of nougat parfait with honeycomb, pistacio pashmak and rose petals; then baked to order caramelised apple tart, and then a cheese platter with probably some of the nicest french double brie I've had for a while. Are we hungry yet?

When they presented the bill to the boss, he was understandably surprised. With everyone partaking freely in the "free" alcohol and food, well... what's two thirds of 10 grand?

Oh well boss, it is only once a year... won't you let us live? By this stage, everyone was alcohol fuelled and up for something, and besides, the sun had come out. Word had got out that the boss had hired about 5 Harley Davidson riders to ride us all to Watson's Bay. I got on one of those double seated ones (no, not the sidecar ones, why does everyone think that?) with another girl, and we were sped down the streets. It was just amazing, just like how it is in the movies. It was so thrilling, being literally centimetres from the road, and nothing surrounding you. All I had to hold onto was the armrest. No wonder it's such a thrill for them. Only now do I understand.

Then we boozed up again at the Watson's Bay Hotel/bar. Well there's not much else to do there besides, actually, but it is beautiful, I have to admit. You could see the city line from where we were sitting underneath the outdoor umbrellas on the rooftop. It was probably one of the most relaxing times of my life.

That must be the happiest kid in the world. So that's where it comes in.

Idiocy to the extreme

I've just read this article online, about a 10 year old girl who was gang raped by about 9 guys, but were let off by the judge saying, oh well, she probably agreed to it. WHAT THE FUCK? There are so many things wrong with this on so many levels I don't know where to begin.

Nine guys were involved, with the 3 eldest ones being 17, 26 and 28. The article mentions THEY were over the age of the consent, as if that should even fucking matter, given they knew full well what they were doing to the girl.

The bitch of a judge says the girl wasn't forced. For fuck's sake, the girl's only 10 years old, and how can you even say she agreed to it, when she probably didn't even know what the hell they were doing to her? And can't you even empathise what that girl might be feeling? They were probably holding her down, and she's probably fucking crying her eyes out and screaming for her life you dumb bitch.

Then she says this to them: "All of you understand that you cannot have sex with a girl under 16. If you do, you are breaking the law, and if you are found out, then you will be brought to court and could end up in jail." Jesus christ woman, they broke the law by having sex with her, and any fucking idiot could tell that was wrong, and that she was obviously underaged. FUCK. And they WERE obviously found out, that's the whole fucking point of the trial. And COULD end up in jail? COULD? As if there even should be a remote possibility that they won't? I'm not even going to answer that.

What really shits me is how this was a female judge who made the ruling. A WOMAN for the love of fucking god. Where the hell is your sense of justice you fucking idiot? HOW could you let these bastards get away with a slap on the wrist? How would she like it she had a 10 year old daughter and this was done to her own flesh and blood. Yeah, give them a light sentence, and I'd like to see her say that her own daughter probably fucking agreed to it. I'd almost like to see HER get raped and have her offenders get off light. Almost. But that'd be too good for her.

Sculpture by the Sea

Alright, I'll give her one more day......and if I don't see something new posted, I'm taking her off my favourites.

Well you people, I've finished my exams, and if that bitch goes well, then I'll get my diploma next semester. It was a pretty bad exam, with the answers to be typed. TYPED I tell ye. So if you don't know your shit, well you might as well print a blank page with your name on it and hand that right in. Thank god I had decent typing skills, but what about those poor suckers out there who are getting by with only 2 fingers? Doesn't seem fair does it? Oh well, that's what happens.

But what the hell was I doing BEFORE then, in the months gone by since October 27? Well, there's this little something I like to call stressing. Work was giving me the shits, and as the exam date loomed closer, I should have been freaking out even more, but instead, I was channelling all my frustrations into going out and having a good time. As you do.

The first port of call was this little beachside scenario called "Sculpture by the Sea". Some of you may have heard of that before... it's practically famous. It's how art should be, you know what I mean? Out there in the open, pieces of it just littering the beach and coastline. That's what we need, tasteful art in tasteful surroundings. Would you look at that? They could put anything out there on those rocks and call it art.

And for your viewing pleasure, I've uploaded a few pics of my own, taken with my very own camera that I ripped off of work. Ah, the irony.

Left: That's noice. Unusual. Different. In fact, it's one of my favourites from the whole collection. Should have seen the thing in action, swaying around like that, on a couple of invisible axes. The thing even won an award. Pretty mesmerizing. Sorry, you just had to be there. Hmm, I really should find out what it was called. Got the souvenir book around here somewhere...

Update 26 April 2008: The artist is Kaoru Matsumoto of Japan, and the artwork is called cycle-90 (degree), a premonition of wind. It's made of stainless steel and aluminium bearings. It's worth AUD$38,000.



Right: This one here was done by a Japanese artist, and how much would you pay for it?
AUD$85,000, in unmarked, non consecutive bills. Cause it's made of one piece of black granite that's been carved out to perfection, that's what. Look at the workmanship in that thing. Alright, I really have to find that booklet. But just look at that. Smooth as a baby's bum on the surface, and made to look like it's been twisted like a pretzel. You just wanna eat it. Or, maybe not. Mmm, pretzel.

Update: 26 April 08: The piece called oushi - zokei 2007, by the artist Keizo Ushio, who "hopes that a lot of children will touch the sculpture because he's looking forward to what they feel." Awww.




Left: It's a little bottle car. It was half filled with water at the time, and I can just imagine sea creatures renting it out for day trips on the sea bed. This thing runs on H2O, and I love how it just looks like it just got washed up from someone's carhole under the sea.

Alright alright, I'll find the name of it.

Update 26 April 2008: This "pot wagon" was made by Yoshio Nitta of Japan, from copper, resin with fibreglass and stainless steel. The artist's statement is: "I would like to carry the beautiful sky to your mind". It's priced at $AUD35,000. If only it could run like a real car. I'm surprised that I've chosen all these works by Japanese artists.

I've been up to a few other things too, but that's just one of the many adventures of Linhy. Just when you were about to delete me off your favourites. Tsk, tsk, for shame.